Dear Blacksburg, I feel tired and defeated. The apartment I so had my heart set on didn't work out -and I got sick soon after, hence the no posts this week. The only apartment out of 50 apartments that I had my heart set on did not work out! This is where I say to myself "it wasn't meant to be" ...but let me tell you: I did not tell myself that this week after that bad news phone call. I told myself and everyone around me something very different if you can imagine. I locked myself in the bathroom, cried my eyes out and hung my head in the laundry basket for 2 hours. It took me a good few days to get over that. And to realize that I have to start all over again, apartment searching. So I sit here at 2am on a Tuesday night wondering what the hell I'm doing wrong in this process.
1. Am I too picky? this comes to mind first.
2. Am I so stressed out that I just can't make a normal choice?
3. Do I not want to move forward? and why...
About the picky part, I don't think I am too picky! I have to think of the kids (proximity schools, the fact Kenji comes home to eat everyday!, space for them this year) I have to think of JM and recovery. He will need space and comfort. I have to think of cost of living, this is only for 6-9 months so it can be small, or can it? Shouldn't we get something comfortable even if it means more $$$? This will be a special year with special needs.
Living in Fontainebleau is like living in no other city. This is an old city with the Napoleon Chateau! The houses/apartments in and around town are from the 17th century and lots of people live on three levels with bathrooms on the way top and steps on the staircase that are kneehigh! That just doesn't work for me. And so why Fontainebleau? Because it has the international school for Kenji. He just can't go into a normal public French school, Keo can, but Kenji can't. It would be way to difficult. Maybe under normal circumstances YES, but not this year. And I like Fontainebleau, a lot, I married JM right there in the town, Kenji was born there, Petunia lived there, so that's that, dust my knees off, my search must go on.
1 comment:
Gisa, you are an inspiration! You are doing such a great job at making the best of things. I know the apartment search is getting you down but try to hang in there.
The pictures from Halloween are great. I wish I'd known there was a breakdancer in the neighborhood!
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